Bubbles Dinner

Well, what can I say, it went alright, not as good as I'd hoped. I had invited 9 people and 5 showed up. It's hard not to take it personally when people bail on me, but I keep trying anyway. I have to learn that I can't control the situation, people do things for their own reasons. Granted Legs was sick and didn't want to share and I appreciate that.

But what really ticked me off was Big Bro, he said he was going to come but bailed at the last minute again. I'm getting really tired of his attitude lately. He told me that he'd always be there for me but he's been bailing lately for no reason, and I can't understand it. I asked him outright if I had done something but he said no, but wouldn't explain. Maybe he just can't handle friendship with a woman, maybe I depend on him too much. I was supposed to be one of the guys and they could say anything but lately both Big Bro and J-Man have been excluding me and that's not cool. At least not with me.

Its interesting watching convo going back and forth at dinner, supper or whatever they call it out here. I had wanted everyone to enjoy themselves and not feel uncomfortable. But that didn't happen. Fairy Mae is a super chick, but I could tell she wasn't enjoying herself and didn't know how to fix it. And Gerry, well he was uncomfortable too. What could I do, if everyone had showed up, the atomstphere would have changed and things would have been totally different.

What really blew me away was the Rock, he was so helpful. He helped clean the table and immediately started doing dishes. Can you believe that, the ex would have never done that, he wanted to be waited on hand and foot. Don't get me wrong the Rock likes to be pampered too. I recognize our situation is different, and neither one of us knows where its headed. But he's respectful, and funny and can actually carry on a convo. We'll see one day at a time......